i know i haven't posted to wish everyone a happy new year yet but i'll get around to it. this morning we attended a funeral for a family friend who passed away from liver cancer. she had been battling the disease all fall and on January 1st, she lost her fight. i really did not know her that well, but used to babysit for her three precious children when they were younger. it breaks my heart thinking about them being left without their mother at such a time in their lives.

they talked a lot today about Mrs. Utt's joy and love for life and for the Lord. how even in her final days she was content with the path God had chosen for her, and had found a certain peace in the face of her disease. it's heartbreaking and inspiring and confusing to loose someone like this. you can't help but just ask why? someone so vibrant and so committed to the Lord.

but what it does show me in some ways is how i want to live my life. with radiance and happiness and a certain peace. they used a metaphor from a poem today describing Melissa, it said: "a bride married to amazement." married to amazement, what a stunning image. i think it's one i'll always hold onto. i want to live my life as a bride married to amazement. with joy and awe and excitement for everything that God gives me, no matter what. on such a sad day I find that God still opens the door to hope.